Disclaimers and Letters

At our church our pastor has led us through the book of Genesis for the past year. I know, that sounds like a long time to go through just one of the books, but it was well worth it. Our pastor, Kelly Graham doesn’t believe in rushing through things and possibly missing out on what might be a crucial verse or scripture lesson. It’s been an awesome study. I was just thinking that if we took a year for each book we would finish our first run through the Bible in 65 years. Well, I’m willing to sit and study for that long if Yahweh allows me to live to 121 years old. Imagine being called to live that long in this sick and dying world. It would be more like a prison sentence than a long life.

One of the factoids that can be seen in the Book of Genesis is that there are a few instances where Yahweh uses the lesser rather than the greater; or should I say he used the younger rather than the older, the one who is supposed to have all of the blessing.

The first such case would be when Yahweh chooses Yitzak over Yishmael. Any way that you look at it, the birth of Ishmael was a big blunder, first because it showed a lack of faith on Abraham’s part, second because he listened to his wife instead of waiting on Yahweh, and third because the birth of Yishmael brought about the people who are causing most of the strife in this world today, namely the Arabs and other descendants of Yishmael. Yahweh knew that the promise would come through Yitzak.

The second case where we see the younger supplanting the older is with the births of Esau and Ya’acov. Remember that Rebecca received a promise from Yahweh that Ya’acov would become great and that Yahweh would choose the him. There was contention even while the baby’s were in Rebecca’s womb; scripture telling us that the children wrestled within the womb. We may never know if perhaps Ya’acov was supposed to be born first and Esau supplanted him in birth, but we know that Yahweh knew the outcome because He told Rebecca that the older would serve the younger. In all situations, Yahweh prevails as victor. We know there rest of the account, how Esau sold his birthright to Ya’acov for a bowl of stew and later how Ya’acov, at the urging of his mother, tricked his father Yitzak into giving him the family blessing instead of Esau. This caused Ya’akov problems throughout his lifetime, but it accomplished Yahweh’s will throughout all subsequent generations.

At the end of Genesis, we see how the younger again received the double portion of blessing. Yehuda received the Messianic blessing; thus we know Yeshua as The Lion of The Tribe of Yehuda, but something very interesting happened when it came to Yosef’s sons. Remember that Yosef was two sons, Manasseh and Ephraim, both born to their Egyptian mother. At the end of his life, when Yisrael (AKA Ya’acov) was handing out blessings, Yosef brought his two sons to Yisrael to receive their blessings. Manasseh was the oldest and Ephraim the youngest. We’re also told that Yisrael adopted the two boys as his own sons. That seems strange, until you realize that they were born to an Egyptian mother, outside of the promise line and had to be redeemed by Yisrael so that they could receive a promise. Apart from the adoption, they would have been bastard children in the lineage of Yisrael and could not be afforded any promise or any other blessings. Later in the history there would be a split in the Children of Yisrael to where one kingdom would be called Yehuda and the other Ephraim. We see that the youngest son of the next to youngest son received a blessing.

As far as I can tell, through the research that I’ve done for quite a long time, it has always been the custom of most of the world to bestow blessings and/or money and power to the oldest child. And for the most part, the one receiving the blessing would be a male.

As many of you know, I am a Heinz 57 when it comes to my lineage. My knowledge is that I am German, Italian, Danish, Polish, Austrian and of course my paternal great-grandmother was Jewish. From what I can ascertain, the blessing of the oldest son was paramount in all of the cultures that I descended from. My surname is Italian, meaning that most associate me with having southern European heritage. Italians are notorious for the blessing of the oldest son. My grandfather was no exception. The first to be born was my uncle Warren, then my uncle John and then my dad, James Ruffino. Although it was not blatantly practiced, it was easy to see how my grandfather favored my Uncle Warren and his descendants. Warren was the image of perfection to my grandparents, as were his offspring. My cousins were always offered the best first and what was left over fell to my Uncle John’s son Larry and finally to my dad’s offspring. I’m not jealous about this, and never have been because I knew my dad’s heart and how he loved my sister and me. I saw the favoritism of my grandfather toward the older brothers and how my dad seemed to be a burden to my grandfather. I also saw how Yahweh was with us all the time.

So what do I mean when I say that I saw how Yahweh was with us all the time? Well, our family was different than all other families in our neighborhood. Our neighborhood consisted mostly of people from European descent, meaning that it consisted of Italians, Germans, Poles with a few Irish and Spanish thrown in. If you’re adept at knowing such populations, you know that for the most part, these ethnicity’s tend to be Roman Catholic where religion is concerned. My grandfather was the exception. When he was a young man he decided that he was tired of the hypocrisy of the Catholic Church and converted to become a Lutheran. I think that this partly had to do with my grandmother whose people were Lutheran, but the fact is that grandpa left Catholicism, something that Italians rarely do because when they do they are usually spurned by those that still remain Catholic. Personally, as my grandfather confirmed to me, he also felt led to leave his former religion, as though it was a calling he felt compelled to follow.

Another thing that always made me feel proud was that my grandfather was probably the only man of Italian descent that didn’t take bribes, graft and he didn’t bow to the pressure to break the law like many other Italians did. We always heard how grandpa was “into politics” when he was younger. I later found out that this consisted of him being the city health inspector, a position that was given out by the elected officials of our town. He was often asked to look the other way or take money so as to falsify reports, which he never did, much to the chagrin of those above him. Consequently, those same people tried to defame my grandfather and falsely accuse him of many things, all of those false reports falling by the wayside, I think, because my grandfather had Yahweh’s  favor. So, if our family did have special favor with  Yahweh, it was because my grandfather wanted to be righteous and act righteous and Yahweh rewarded him by showing grace and prosperity to not only grandpa, but his sons and his son’s sons.

My dad was a construction works, a plumber by trade when he was young and later a pipefitter. My dad wasn’t one to play politics either, which isn’t a good thing when you belong to a Union. Dad would quit jobs when he found out that certain nefarious people were running the job or if he knew that something crooked was going on. Frankly, dad was out of work a lot. Even though unemployment often hinders people and causes them to bend to the pressures that dad was put under, he never budged from his convictions. And, although he was out of work a lot, we always had money from one source or another. We never starved and we always had clean clothes on our backs and we always had a roof over our heads. I’m not trying to paint a picture that things were totally easy for us, but things could have been much worse. However bad it may have seemed at times, we always had our needs met and Yahweh’s provision was always for us and to us.

When my dad was an older man and he was born again we would talk a lot. Dad always gave Yahweh the credit for the times when Yahweh fed us, housed us and clothed us and dad knew that there was some sort of special calling on us. My uncles on the other hand always had provision through work. They had the big cars, the nice homes and all of the things that they could provide for themselves. My older uncle and his wife were known to be skinflints. They saved every dollar that they made and when they were older they never lacked for anything. The memory that their kids have of their parents are memories of always getting the cheapest clothing and such. One of my cousins told me that when she was old enough to work, she was responsible for providing her own feminine products. Her brother never had a new pair of Levi’s Jeans until he was able to work and buy them for himself. This sort of paints a picture of how their parents were when it came to providing for family. Where my dad and mom bought things for us sometimes in their poverty and prayed for the provision, my older uncle could provide for their kids and aside from the basic necessities, then never provided anything else.

I’m like my grandfather in so many ways. When I was a young child my mother used to take me to her church; the little Episcopal Church down the street. The Reverend was a nice man and my sister and I were friends with their two younger children. Irregardless, being a child in an Episcopal church is like being a child attending meetings at the Elks Club or some other sort of fraternity that caters mostly to adults. After a while I hated going and fought tooth and nail to stay home with my dad on Sundays. Even at that early age I knew that there really was nothing at the Episcopal Church for anyone that wanted to know Yahweh in any intimate sort of manner. So I went for the next few years trying to find fulfillment; drugs, alcohol and a variety of other religions that seemed to be “fun” and not the boring old stuff shirted religion that mainstream Christianity offered.

A few years later I felt yoked to things that weren’t fulfilling and I started to forage around for the meaning of life; the real meaning of life. Without going through the story again (which can be found on numerous places on my website), I came to faith in Yeshua on July 21, 1979. Right away I knew that this was the destiny that Yahweh had for me; Yeshua was without a doubt, the answer.

It’s almost odd how Yahweh works in saved people. You have to understand that my dad and I had what could only be termed a sarcastic relationship. He liked to rub me the wrong way and I did the same to him and it caused us to fight a lot. Looking back I think that the whole thing stemmed from the fact that I liked to disrespect my dad and before my conversion, I excelled at it. However, just a couple of months after I came to faith in Yeshua dad pulled me aside to ask me a few questions. He said that he noticed that I had become sort of withdrawn and didn’t go out a lot. He asked me why and with the same breath asked me why I had stopped giving him a hard time. I simply told him that I had become a believer in Yeshua and that the Bible said that I had to respect him. I kid you not, within two weeks my dad was in church giving his life to Yeshua, followed by my mom and my sister and, my grandmother who dedicated her life to Yeshua. Within one year Yahweh had saved most of my family and it was glorious; we fell like domino’s and it was glorious.

While in our family it seemed that we came to faith quite easily it isn’t always the case with other families. We all know family’s where only a couple of people come to the saving grace of Yeshua and they’re always known as the family oddities that are belittled and defamed throughout their lives by not so well meaning family members. However, I do think that if a family comes to faith in the simpleness and quick timing that our family did, there had to be some sort of promise that was being fulfilled. It wasn’t coincidence and it wasn’t good fortune that things happened the way that they did, there was a calling, a predestination if you will, to the calling of our line, from my grandfather, to my dad and to my siblings.

As I mentioned earlier, there are many parallels in what happened with the Patriarchs of Israel, in the choosing of the younger over the older and the subsequent blessings that come with a calling I feel that has been placed on my family. My dad was never the favorite of my grandfather, in fact, they bumped head quite often and many times it seemed that my grandfather loved my dad because it was his duty to love him simply because it was a family obligation. Although my grandfather fell into the trap of following a deeply ingrained tradition of honoring the oldest child, Yahweh had other plans and they played out fine and well.

I know that there are many Christians that choose not to believe in predestination because they see it as a Calvinist idea and they hate some of the steps of Calvinism. However, when you see predestination play out in your own family and you see how the things that happened in the line of Abraham tend to play out in your own family it pretty well erases any doubt that there are simply those who Yahweh chooses in families and some that he does not choose. You can have people born to the same mother and father and who are raised basically the same (with some idiosyncrasies like in my family) and yet some seem to get the Gospel Message while other fail to see it.

Now in all fairness to my uncles, I do have to make qualifying statements. My oldest uncle, who went the Jehovah’s Witness way seemed to come to the truth toward the end of his life. When I talked to him he assured me that he knew Yeshua as His way, truth and life and that he believed in Yeshua’s deity. That gave me great comfort for sure. My middle uncle I’m not so sure about. He didn’t really want to talk much about religion and changed the subject when it was brought up. I did write him a letter, telling him about the Love of Yeshua, Yeshua’s purpose, and the Good News of the Gospel. I asked him to consider all of those things and told him about my dad and my grandfather whom I’m sure are in Heaven with Yeshua. I told him that I would be sad if he wasn’t there, seeing that he was my favorite uncle and I was so much like him in many ways. I know he read the letter because he thanked me for it. I can only hope that he made a decision for Yeshua before he drew his last breath.

So, to say that the long Bible study was boring is so untrue. I got to see for the first time how much our family paralleled that of the Patriarchs of Genesis, and how when a line of people is called to Righteousness, there is no one and no situation that will stop it. Like my dad told me many years ago, it seems that there is a special purpose for our family and he knew, even before he knew Yeshua personally, that Yahweh was watching out for us and he knew that we were somehow called to something other than the simple circle of life that so many people live out in their day to day existence.

So, am I bragging about what I have asserted? Well, yes and no. No, we’re not any more special than any other believer in Yeshua, at least from my estimation. And then you have to consider the scripture that says “to who much is given, much is required,” which is a scary notion. I would be remiss if I stated that I am the sort of person that steps up and volunteers for things. The flesh would rather that others do the work and toil for things. That is just common human nature. However, knowing that there is a special purpose in our calling makes me want to step up for such things. I mean after all, Yahweh is standing at the end of time and He’s seen everything that has happened, is currently happening and will happen in the future. It is much easier to step up for tasks than it is to avoid them, knowing that you are probably destined for such things and knowing that being destined for things Yahweh’s going to work in you whether you like it or not. I’m reminded of Jonah who was told to preach to Nineveh but decided to head the other way instead, only to have to live in the belly of a great fish until Yahweh knew that He would comply with Yahweh’s wishes. It’s easier to go with Yahweh flow than it is to swim against His current; which is a stupid decision that never comes to any good.

Again, am I bragging? Well, definitely yes. Yes I brag in Yahweh, whom, out of the almost eight billion people on earth, chose me and my family, and other families and individuals like me for special purposes. He knows that in my flesh I’m really a worthless good-for-nothing, but through His Ruach and through obedience to His Commandments, can be more than a conquerer through His Son Yeshua. From before the foundation of the world He knew that He would call me and all others like me; good for nothing people on our own accord, who were, through the Blood of Yeshua, destined for great exploits and bringing glory to the Name of Yahweh; Yeshua Ha Mashiach.

I know that there are others who know, feel or sense the same calling. I’ve met some of you already. I hope to meet many more before our time on this Earth is finished. And, if I don’t meet you before His return, I know I’ll meet you at that return, or sometime soon afterward.

Quite a few years ago I noticed that there was a strange sort of contrail that came from the back of jet liners as they flew over where I lived at the time. I noticed that the contrails did not dissipate after the plane had left our region of sky but instead they seemed to fan out and many of them would seem to join, turning a beautiful blue sky into a hazy gray sky. Of course the anomaly that I was seeing caused me to do some research. Early on it was hard to find anything on the phenomena and when I would talk with people about it I was dismissed as being a kook that wrote a conspiracy into a normal thing.

As the years went by it became apparent that many others were seeing the same thing that I was and that it was anomalous and unlike the contrails that we had been used to, even as young children. I started to read stories about these trails, that came to be labeled Chemtrails, were actually descending from the sky at times and settling to the ground. I learned that people that came into contact with the material sometimes became sick with a variety of different symptoms, some as simple as symptoms of the common cold but others with things called Morgellons. Morgellons have yet to be identified, but they appear to be some sort of particle or parasite that lives under and emerges from the skin from time to time. As you would guess, those who report having Morgellons are labeled as delusional. I have not personally seen a Margollon, but I have received many descriptions from people who have, and they appear to be real.

Around 2005 I became friends with Jim Wilhelmsen, a researcher from Roswell, New Mexico. Aside from being an avid researcher, Jim liked to ride his motorcycle. He tells a story of riding his bike somewhere near Roswell and during the ride he says that something started to descend from the sky; a substance that could not be avoided. Without protection and open to the elements, Jim breathed the substance in and continued his ride. Afterward, Jim started to experience mid to lower respiratory symptoms and was laid up for a while. He seemed to get better but from time to time his symptoms would flare up and he would feel sick again. Later he would be diagnosed with a precancerous condition for which he received treatment. Jim’s still alive and kicking, proving that Yahweh has other plans for Jim’s life.

When I was a  kid I had to attend gym class like all of the other kids. Whenever we had running exercises I would always feel a tightness in my larnyx (throat) but being a kid I though that this was normal and all of those that ran got the same feeling. Thinking back now I can deduce that I had a little bit of asthma, but nothing debilitating and it never really effected my life. Aside from that, I was a totally healthy child who grew up into a totally healthy man. As far as my lungs are concerned, I did get pneumonia back around 1985 but that was cured with a regimen of penicillin and I never had any ill side effects afterward. I rarely got sick as an adult. Oh, I had the occasional flu and some colds, but I always got over them quickly and completely.

Back in 2007 I met a wonderful woman online and we made plans to meet in April of 2008. It was a hard time for Lourdes because here sister died from colon cancer in December of the prior year and her mother died from emphysema late in February of 2008. We decided that toward the middle of April would be a good time to meet. I would ask for her father’s hand in marriage and propose at the end of this almost month long trip.

I boarded the only flight that left for Mexico City around midnight. The red-eye flight was the only flight offered from Sacramento airport. I tried to sleep but really couldn’t. It was at dawn that I looked out of my seat’s window and noticed that we were cutting through some funny looking clouds. The clouds were parallel to our flight plan and I could see about six pair of these clouds. It was then that I realized that we were cutting through a chemtrail that some airplane had left there previously. I didn’t worry too much seeing that someone that I thought was wise had informed me that jet liners never take in outside air, but they recycle the air that is in the cabin. Therefore I reasoned, the chemtrail material would stay outside and not affect me.

After a short layover in Guadalajara for a custom’s check we boarded back onto the plane to continue to Mexico City. My future wife met me in the airport and we were brought back to their home by their family’s driver. On the way to their family home I started to get a tickle in my throat which turned into a cough by the time that we arrived in the Florida District of Mexico City. To make a long story short, that little tickle turned into an unproductive cough that persisted not only during my weeks in Mexico City, but for about three months after I returned back to California. I remember thinking, “oh great, her dad is going to think that I have TB or something.” I am sure that the pollution in Mexico City didn’t help my condition, but I grew up in Bergen County, New Jersey where the air was constantly polluted and I drove through plumes of DDT spray when I was a kid and it never caused me this kind of breathing problem.

So after I finally recovered it was time for me to fly back to Mexico City to marry Lourdes. We decided to have an actual wedding for her family’s sake and then we would have a wedding in California three months later to satisfy the Immigration Authorities. We married just a few days after I arrived and then we went to Tepotzlan to spend out honeymoon night there and then for almost two weeks at a friend’s home on the mountainside of Acapulco Bay. I had not ill lung effects during that time. If it had been Mexico City’s air pollution I should have been affected during my few days there.

I noticed that while we were married and living in Sacramento I would get an occasional flareup of what the doctors labeled bronchitis. I had never had bronchitis in my life prior to this, EVER! When respiratory illness went around, if I caught the but it would last for months while others got over it in a week or so. I found this alarming but never put my finger on it. At the end of December of 2010 my Lourdes succumbed to meningitis brought on by a burst brain abscess. After close to a year of mourning I met and later married my current wife. I moved to the Willamette Valley of Oregon which is where she lived and we married a few weeks later. My wife has three daughters by her first husband and each of them have children, all whom are very dear to me. Two of the youngest’s daughter’s children have chronic asthma and often they would spend time with us. I remember one October her two younger children came to spend the weekend with us and her little girl coughed in my face. About three days later I came down with bronchitis and it lasted until around the first of the year. I had no sooner gotten better than the kids spent more time with us and the little girl coughed again which resulted in three more months of bronchitis. The next couple of years were relatively bronchitis free and I thought that I was on the mend, finally. At or around November of 2015 I was teaching at a local trade college. At that time a upper respiratory bug was going around that was nasty even to people without breathing problems. Of course I caught it even though I isolated myself from the students in the class and washed my hands like we nurses have always been trained to do. At the middle of February I decided to go and see a doctor who diagnosed me with asthmatic bronchitis. He gave me inhalers and sent me home. A month later I returned to the doctor because if anything, the condition was worse. I was given a stronger inhaler and sent home. Not getting results from a medical group that didn’t seem to want to fix things I saw an outside doctor who increased my inhaler strength again and gave me a script for Singulair. I actually started to feel better. Right around this time I started a new job and I had to climb some stairs to get into the building and found that I was very winded, so after taking the Singulair I actually got some of my breathing back. The problem is that even today my breathing is still a little diminished and I still wheeze quite a bit, both indications that asthma still exists.

Back during the time that my granddaughter coughed on me and I got the bad bronchitis I started to do more serious research. First, I found out that jet liners really do take in air from the outside, so it is very possible that I was exposed to whatever that chemtrail contained. I also compared symptoms with Jim Wilhelmsen and noticed that many of them were the same. I went online to research from the small and independent researchers, you know the kind, those who are not associated with any interests that could cause them to lie. I found one particular site run by a man named Russ Tanner. I found it very informative and helpful. I found something that I had never seen before, but that others have both suffered from and have named, they call it Chemtrail Flu.

The problem with the Chemtrail Flu is that it seems to be something that becomes a chronic condition. It is as if it waits in the shadows for a primary infection, like the common cold or the common flu and then it kicks into gear, making something that healthy people get over quickly into something that is almost debilitating. I have told my wife that during the fall, winter and spring that I really need to know that the grandchildren are not infected with any sort of virus or bacterial infection. We have resolved that if either of us gets sick that I will retreat to the living room couch, easy-chair or upstairs to the spare bedroom. Getting any sickness that has to do with breathing isn’t good for me. I have to be more diligent at work and outside the home to wash hands like my life depends on it, but it may well be that way.

So why would the government or any company want to spray something into the air that would affect people in such an evil way? Well, if you’ve ever read the edicts on the Georgia Guidestones, you know that the Elites would like for the population of the Earth to be lowered to no more than five hundred million people. Given today’s world population of 7.2 billion people, that would mean they would have to cause the deaths of just under 7 billion people. I would say that aside from dropping a nuclear device on large population areas (which would destroy the earth) the best way and the fastest way is to create an illness that will take out hundreds of millions if not billions of people. The plague in Europe back in the Middle Ages killed millions of people as well as the Spanish Influenza epidemic back around 1917. My paternal great grandmother lost four siblings from influenza during that time frame. One way to destroy a people is to take away their defenses, or to weaken them so that someone or something else can destroy them. By giving people like myself a predisposition to getting bad cases of bronchitis after simple flulike illnesses is a perfect way to rid the world of what the Elites call “undesirables.”

Another way that the Elites can destroy us is by the use of GMO foods. It’s a fact that all corn grown in the US has been genetically modified. Much of it is modified so that it has a much higher fructose content. Before we had a falling out with Cuba we imported a lot of sugar grown from sugarcane. It was a natural and untainted sugar source. When our population was smaller in the US the supply of cane sugar from Hawaii and Cuba was enough to sustain the demand in the US. When products from Cuba were banned the supply of sugar from Hawaii didn’t meet the demand of the US population so manufacturers started to use corn fructose made from real corn. When science caught up and was able to produce corn with a higher fructose content something called High Fructose Corn Syrup was utilized to sweeten products. The problem is that HFCS cannot be produced properly in the human body and it affects the liver negatively plus it causes fatty deposits to build up on our organs. A snippet from an article written by someone at Harvard University explains it well. Be sure to click on the link to the full article after you finish this blog entry:

The entry of fructose into the liver kicks off a series of complex chemical transformations. (You can see a diagram of these at health.harvard.edu/172.) One remarkable change is that the liver uses fructose, a carbohydrate, to create fat. This process is called lipogenesis. Give the liver enough fructose, and tiny fat droplets begin to accumulate in liver cells (see figure). This buildup is called nonalcoholic fatty liver disease, because it looks just like what happens in the livers of people who drink too much alcohol.

Virtually unknown before 1980, nonalcoholic fatty liver disease now affects up to 30% of adults in the United States and other developed countries, and between 70% and 90% of those who are obese or who have diabetes.

Early on, nonalcoholic fatty liver disease is reversible. At some point, though, the liver can become inflamed. This can cause the low-grade damage known as nonalcoholic steatohepatitis (steato meaning fat and hepatitis meaning liver inflammation). If the inflammation becomes severe, it can lead to cirrhosis — an accumulation of scar tissue and the subsequent degeneration of liver function. [Source: http://www.health.harvard.edu/heart-health/abundance-of-fructose-not-good-for-the-liver-heart]

What most fail to realize is that Corporate America is for the most part parasitic in nature. A parasite is defined as something that lives off a host life-form. With companies like Monsanto the produce products that destroy us from the inside while they work in concert with other companies that destroy us from the outside and with drug companies that keep us alive as long as possible so that every possible dollar can be taken before we finally succumb. All of the food is tainted, the water is rapidly being undrinkable and the drug companies are keeping up pace just enough to keep us alive to suffer a miserable existence through a variety of diseases and conditions that we all need drugs for along with food to sustain us, or so they say.

A few years ago I met a woman who was a friend of a friend. This woman is environmentally conscience and stands up for such causes. I asked this woman what her thoughts were on Chemtrails. She said that she knew that they are real. She also said something that totally blew me aside. She said that a friend of hers had a meeting with Barack Obama who confided in her that Chemtrails are real and that they are being used to protect us from the sun during our crisis of global warming. Basically, they are used to bounce radiation back into space and guard us from the sun’s harmful rays, according to Obama.

The thing is this, that is what clouds do. Clouds filter harmful UV rays. Then let me pose a question that blows the global warming theory out of the water. Living in Oregon I have flown from Portland to other destinations. We have a lot of rain in Oregon and also a lot of clouds. When leaving Portland and also arriving there I have personally seen chemtrails above the rain clouds. Why spray above something that is going to do what chemtrails are supposed to do, and much more effectively than chemtrails. The answer is simply that they want the ingredients in the chemtrails to mix with the clouds so that it can intermingle with the rain and bring whatever is in those chemtrails right down to our doorsteps, our lawns and our whole terrestrial environment. Those who are in charge of chemtrail spraying are insidious people and they know just how to affect us and infect us. They are implicit in carrying out the first of the Georgia Guidestone’s Illuminati Ten Commandments, “Maintain humanity under 500,000,000 in perpetual balance with nature.”

What I expect is that someday, when they are ready, we will witness one of the most devious and purposeful flu epidemics that has ever been unleashed against humanity. Many of us with weakened respiratory systems will probably not survive without divine intervention. Others, who have eaten beef tainted with hormones and antibiotics along with those who have eaten vegetables tainted with pesticides will succumb because they have compromised immune systems. Those who have insisted on getting vaccine injections will succumb too because their immune systems have been severely compromised because of mercury in the injections as well as the DNA of other plants and animals that are used to produce the vaccines. It will be a literal holocaust epidemic that very few will escape.

If you would like to read more about Chemtrail Flu then please click here to go to Global Skywatch where you will find a plethora of information.

This year in July I will be 39 years old in Yeshua. It’s been a long road, not as long as some, but longer than others. During my life, I’ve been to a variety of churches. I was educated and confirmed in an Episcopalian church when I was a young man. Afterward, I sowed my wild oats, only to realize the filth and fruitlessness of sin, culminating in my asking Yeshua into my life and heart, repenting of my sinfulness and moving forward into a life, living with His Spirit within me, guiding me through all of the bumps, switchbacks and other obstacles that lie in the road of Faith in  Yeshua Ha Mashiach.

I believe that Yahweh leads us to the right church that we need at each and every season of our lives. When I was first saved I attended a church that taught me the rudimentary elements of Faith. When I wanted meat instead of bread I became Pentecostal, worshiping at an Assembly of God. When I saw the corruption at that church I left and was lead to a Four Square Church where I continued to grow. That church was one big clique so I left there and actually backslid in faith for about four years. Yahweh moved me across the country to North Carolina where I found an awesome church and thrived my short time there. Moving back to California I was led to a church that had all sorts of problems and although I wanted to flee from that place, Yahweh told me to stay and to intercede for that fellowship. It was hard to stay there, but I got to see some fruit from the prayers that I offered up to Yahweh. I left there and didn’t attend church for a year or two but then was introduced by a sister in Yahweh to a church named Last Days Harvest Ministries. Pastor Tom Mooney and his wife Roberta treated me wonderfully and Tom recognized my ministry to people in the UFO cults as being a legitimate ministry. I married my first wife during this time, a wonderful woman from Mexico that loved Yeshua. She had left Catholicism many years before and was an outcast from her family. Unfortunately, Lourdes went to be with Yeshua a little more than two years into our marriage. I mourned for a year and then found my present wife Barbara, who lived up in Oregon. We married in 2012 upon which time I had to leave Tom and Roberta and move to Oregon.

Barbara was attending a church in Eugene, Oregon that seemed to be on the mark. I hit it off well with the pastor at first but then got into little conflicts with him in regard to people in the church that were leading the fellowship down the road toward the New Age. The pastor was great in many ways but was willfully ignorant when it came to people in his fellowship and what they were doing. It almost seemed like this pastor was willing to let transgressions occur, and I think that he believed that if he prayed hard enough that Yahweh would take care of the problems. I sort of mused that it would be like a shepherd seeing wolves mingling with the flock and just praying that Yahweh would make the wolves go away. That is not a shepherd, that is an observer. So much for emulating Yeshua, right? Toward the end of our tenure there it became evident that the pastor had his own little doctrinal idiosyncrasies, and you know how the old adage goes, “if you live in a glass house you cannot throw stones.” I guess that one could also throw in, “birds of a feather flock together,” into the mix.

So Barbara and I, along with a good friend left that fellowship. Barbara and I decided to try other churches in Eugene but we found it hard to find a church that taught the true Gospel of Yeshua. Yes, many taught prosperity and Word of Faith, but few talked about sin, hell, and holiness. We tried what was then the biggest Baptist Church in Eugene, but were turned off by some of the parishioners. One family was put off that we were sitting in their seats and they weren’t quiet about it. I made arrangements with the head pastor to address the problem, to even come to the church and show him where we sat, but that idea just fell through the cracks. We visited a few other churches of varying flavors but found nothing that we could call home.

Before we proceed, let me express my thoughts about something. The modern Church, at least here in America doesn’t teach the preamble to the Gospel of Yeshua Ha Mashiach. Yes, it is true that Yahweh so loved the world that He gave his own son to die for the world. And yes, it is true that we’re saved if we confess Yeshua with our mouth and believe in our hearts that Yahweh raised Him from the dead. What they leave out is the reason why Yahweh had to give His Son and what exactly we’re saved from? Please allow me to use a New Jersey analogy. Let’s say that one night you got home from work and I walked up to you and told you that you had been saved today(physically through something that I had done) and that I had acted several times today to save you, you’d probably be oblivious to what I was talking about. You might even call the police to say that I was harassing you. However, if I came up to you and explained that the mob has a contract on your life, and that your car brakes lines were cut but I fixed them before you got into the car, and that a window of the store that shattered near you was broken by a bullet that was meant for you, and oh, let’s say that the car that blew up a block away happened because I confused the assassin and he picked the wrong car; then I told you that I saved you several times that day, you’d understand, right? Now equate that to what many churches are doing nowadays. They are inviting people to come to Yeshua to be saved, yet they fail to tell people what they are saved from. They preach the happy ending to the story without telling people why the happy ending is so happy.

It was then that we decided to branch out. If we couldn’t find a church in Eugene or Springfield then we’d just go north. We tried an Assembly of God church in Brownsville, Oregon but the pastor was not friendly at all, and in addition, the pastor was a woman. Scripture is quite clear that this is not to be. The next week we went further out into the sticks and found a church in an unincorporated part of Linn County. The people there seemed friendly and the pastor was a young man who has a fire for Yeshua. The churchmen were hunters and fishermen, liked to split firewood and other things that I found appealing. We attended there for almost two years, even joined the church. Things started to happen in that second year. One of the women in the church started to glare at us when we would see her at church. I was told by a local person in town that she had always been that way, but where was the change that happens at New Birth? Her father in-law was hung up on Preterism, a notion that the apocalypse occurred with the destruction of the Temple in 70 A.D. and that the Church replaces Israel. Yet another person, the church narcissist approached me one day and said that he’d like to be a missionary to Muslims. I merely said that he should be careful and read up on Islam before he made any move. He immediately labeled me as being prejudice and walked away. That whole day he called me prejudice, excusing his judgment by saying that all people have some sort of prejudice. The thing is that I was seeing the same sort of willful ignorance that I saw at the church in Eugene, the pastor even admitting that there are screwed up people (his words) in his fellowship and that he keeps praying for them. We quietly left that church. There are some very nice people at that church and we didn’t want to cause a stir or offend anyone.

So here we sit in Oregon, the most unchurched state in America, looking for a church that will teach holiness, righteousness, godliness and of course that sin exists and it is the reason that we have a need for the redemption of Yeshua’s blood. In an attempt to reach out to a church down the road in hopes that we might find a place to attend, we were told by the pastor that he doesn’t address issues that are controversial. He’ll preach the Gospel and essential theology, which is good of course, but not for or against any of the doctrines that are out there that one might consider gray areas. In an attempt to help us find a fellowship, he suggested a Mennonite Church and a Church of Christ. My wife and I walked out of this man’s church dumbfounded, that he would suggest such churches. It was a clear sign to us that this man knows nothing about faith beyond the foundation of Christian theology, and his suggestion of those two churches made us wonder if he even knows that. As we walked out to our truck my wife said that she felt sad. She remarked that this man’s congregation will be perpetual babes in Messiah and that they will never grow to know the fullness of Yeshua. That is true of that church, and many others.

As you can see, we have run into many instances where the leaders and people in churches are willfully ignorant. And pardon me if this offends you, but if you break down those words, you can say that it is people being dumb on purpose. Look up the words in a Greek Lexicon for yourself if you do not believe me. Why would someone be purposefully ignorant? Well, it could be that they do not like confrontations. It could be that they are afraid that if they stir the pot a bit it could cause a church split. Church splits cause loss of revenue and loss of revenue causes church closures. I’ve seen it many times, where churches become stagnant, thus becoming a “us four and no more” sort of fellowship. People looking for living water cannot and will not stay in a stagnant pond that is filled with pond scum and is a haven for spiritual mosquito’s that suck the life’s blood out of the followers of Yeshua. It is an established fact that running streams and small rivers purify themselves through a process called self-purification. Think about it, when you are standing by a small stream or river there is a constant flow of fresh water that flows by you. Fresh water enters your location and fresh water leaves your location. You have a better chance of not getting ill from drinking out of a moving stream than you do a stagnant pond. Flowing water washes away impurity too. In the same manner, a church that wants to grow will grow and if allowed, the Ruach Ha Kodesh will bring in constant freshness and renewal.

But when you think about it, the willful ignorance isn’t just a church thing, it is a worldly thing. We live in a society where information can be had twenty-four / seven and just a simple Google search can yield information on both sides of an issue. A smart man will look at all sources before he makes a determination. If we look very carefully we can see where people lie and distort the truth. For instance, the liberal news sources said that the turnout for the Trump Inauguration was light compared to Obama’s 2012 inauguration. They showed pictures that supposedly showed that the Trump Event had a much smaller turnout. But the idiots at CNN also showed a video of the Trump Inauguration which showed the crowds going back as far as the eye could see. They contradicted their own lie. They didn’t have to be judged by a jury of their peers because their two pieces of evidence contradicted each other and convicted them.

The sum of all of this is a pride problem, both in the world and among Christians. I am certainly not one to lecture any of you about pride. I find it creeping up on me all the time. But I can say that it can be mastered if one wants to master it and to ask Yahweh to help us to work in this area. Without Him, mastering pride is impossible. One of the ways that Yahweh helped me to master pride is in my marriages. Marriage is difficult because it is always like a Chevy marrying a Ford. Now both are cars, both are American, both have engines, transmissions and many of the same moving parts, yet each acts differently, each sounds different and parts are not interchangeable, except for maybe light bulbs. The Chevy might not drive the same as the Ford and the firing order of their spark plugs are different on each engine but the principle is the same. The only one that can understand each care is an auto mechanic. A good mechanic can work on most cars and make them run properly. Likewise, men and women are different. My mother once told me, “stop trying to understand women because men and women will never ever understand each other.” However, our mechanic, Yahweh, understands both men and women because he made us.

Like I alluded, marriage can be difficult because two different models become one flesh, although they’re independent, they become one in purpose and destiny. I became a widower in 2010 when my first wife passed away suddenly from meningitis. We had a very good marriage but like most marriages, we sometimes didn’t see things eye to eye. I’ve never been one for arguing, so when we would get into our heated discussions I proposed that we both go into separate rooms and pray about the matter. She agreed, and we would go into separate rooms for periods of up to half an hour to pray. Neither of us prayed for Yahweh to show the other that they were wrong, but that He would bring clarity to each of us and help us to understand each other. I can’t number the times that both of us would come back together realizing that our pride had gotten in the way, we would apologize one to the other and our differences always turned out to bring us closer together by practicing putting Yahweh first in our relationship. My belief is that most marriages break-up because either one or both of the people are unrelenting in their determination of proving the other person wrong. With my first wife, and also with my wife today we often retreat to circumspection and every time we will both apologize for being wrong which leads to resolution of the conflict.

Bringing it back to that one church that we attended, where the pastor was allowing New Age practices to come into the church we can see how pride is destroying this man’s church and his ministry. Truth be told, we approached him in love about allowing New Age practices. We were never condemning and never gossipped behind the back of the pastor. We never mentioned our concerns to other church members, but did have other church members voice their concerns to us. Before we left that congregation for good we noticed that the pastor himself was taking on the heresy of “The Tabernacle of David” doctrine. The sad thing is that after having addressed the pastor the pastor started to turn against us. I was called to a meeting at a local restaurant where the two elders basically told me that if I kept talking to the pastor about these things my wife and I could be asked to leave the church. I was also reminded of all of the good things that they did for my wife when she was going through a hard time. It felt like I was having a meeting with two “fixers” from the mob. In addition, there were other signs that we noticed that caused us alarm. One was that the pastor’s wife seemed to dictate the policies of the church in almost every aspect. Another was that the person that was bringing in the New Age aspects to the church was on the church board and was the treasurer, and continued to be so even after we addressed her paganism. I could go on, but what good would that do. The thing is that when these things were addressed they were dismissed immediately. As far as I could ascertain, there never was any attempt to contemplate what we were saying or to seek Yahweh’s thoughts on the matters. In shepherding terms it was as though the pastor would rather sacrifice a few sheep than to address the lions that were destroying his church. Think about the mess that he’d have to address. He’d have to confront his wife to tell her that she needed to take a back seat and listen rather than talk. Knowing the woman, that would have been a disaster in its own right. Second, he’d have to bring those who were introducing paganism into his church to repent or leave. Third, he’d have to repent himself and turn away from the heresy that he was fostering. It’s much easier to remain willfully ignorant than to swim against those currents. The question, however, begs to be asked, what if Yeshua had decided to become willfully ignorant? What if he decided, “I don’t want to die for the people. I don’t want to free them from sin and death because crucifixion is just too hard to bear.” So much for being Christlike.

Perhaps that is why Yeshua tells us to take up our cross and follow him, why the authors of the Epistles exhort us to strive to be like Yeshua, and why if we consider our family more important than Him we are not worthy of Him. In essence, if you can’t pastor your flock, go and get another job and give the flock to someone who wants to tend the sheep. Perhaps it should be a required credit course for those who want to pastor to go to the third world to work alongside a real shepherd. Maybe when an up and coming pastor can see how wolves and mountain lions are constantly chased away they will be able to see the dangers that they are supposed to protect the sheep from. Perhaps when that same person sees a mangled sheep in misery because it was half eaten the night before, or when they have to physically intervene to keep a sheep safe it will sink in what their job is really about. Perhaps then he will see that he himself is vulnerable to attack by wild animals and that he always has to keep vigilant to protect himself and the sheep. Maybe this is what is lacking and perhaps this is why pastors in western nations tend to be willfully ignorant when it comes to doing what is right resisting what is wrong. Maybe then the everyday parishioner will see the example of what a real Christian should be. Maybe then they will be taught that there is no compromise when it comes to caring for each other.

I have noticed a huge difference between pastors that have pastored churches in bad neighborhoods or who come from dangerous parts of the world, and those who have gone to cemeteries and acquired the book smarts. The prior have street smarts and practical experience in this world while the others have been taught the doctrinal theories that in most cases are not effective in this world. A good friend of mine and a wonderful brother in Mashiach, Jim Wilhelmsen, started one of the first Christian motorcycle ministries in the Detroit area way back in the 60’s. He and his members were threatened, their church was firebombed twice and they were constantly harassed by demonic bikers from motorcycle clubs. Jim just continued on and his persistence paid off because his long-suffering caused the other clubs to have respect for him and his parishioners. Some of the outlaw bikers actually got saved.

On the flip-side, we now have churches that will allow practicing homosexuals to come into the church and worship there because they want to appear tolerant.  One church, down in Eugene, Oregon decided to mount a “Church Sucks” campaign because that phrase appeals to the unchurched and they thought that it would bring people into the church. Later that year they started to play Katy Perry songs during worship times in order to keep the people that they deceived with the prior campaign. Soon the pastor was found to be an adulterer and was asked to leave the church. He did leave, but instead of repenting, he left his wife and shacked up with his Jezebel girlfriend. Being willfully ignorant and not correcting the condition only leads to further atrophy of one’s condition which finalizes with the destruction of the man or woman that compromises little at first and full bore later on.

If you want to succeed in your walk with Yeshua and you want your ministry to thrive then just quit compromising and replace a willfully ignorant spirit with one that is fully involved in serving Yeshua by following His commandments, thus accomplishing His will. We’re supposed to be selfless, giving of ourselves constantly so that the world can see what real Believers in Yeshua are. Anyone can believe in Jesus. Heck, Satan believes in Jesus, but the big difference is when we believe Jesus, in what he said, who he is, and what start doing what he commanded us to do. It all starts out with practicing love, which is a culmination of the Torah and the Prophets. When we love each other we cannot possibly willfully ignorant because love conquers selfishness and pride. I finish this text with this scripture:

And shall not God avenge his own elect, which cry day and night unto him, though he bear long with them? I tell you that he will avenge them speedily. Nevertheless when the Son of man cometh, shall he find faith on the earth? And he spake this parable unto certain which trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others: Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican. The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican. I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess. And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner. I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted. Luke 18:7-14

BRING JUDGMENT AND BLESSING

 

OH YHWH – LAWLESSNESS ABOUNDS

PEOPLE RUN TO AND FRO IN ENDLESS FUTILITY

EACH ONE DOES WHAT IS RIGHT IN HIS OWN EYES

THOSE IN AUTHORITY IGNORE THE CRIES OF THE OPPRESSED

THEIR DECISIONS ARE SHALLOW AND EMPTY

THE CARING THAT THEY ONCE HAD HAS NOW DEPARTED

THOSE ABOVE US ARE DEVOID OF WISDOM

UNDERSTANDING HAS FLED FAR FROM THEM

IN THEM CAN BE FOUND NO SANITY

THEIR FOUNDATIONS ARE BUILT ON WET SAND

THEY FLAIL WILDLY TO WARD OFF THE GNAT

BUT THEY FAIL TO SEE THE CAMEL THAT WALKS BY THEM

THEIR WHIP STINGS HORRIBLY AS IT CRACKS ON OUR BACKS

THE WEAPON OF THEIR TONGUE ASSAULTS OUR VERY SPIRITS

THEY GIVE A MEAGER PITTANCE TO MAKE AMENDS

THEY PROCLAIM THE PRICE OF THEIR GIFT

THEN THEY OFFER IT TO US CHARGING USURY

OFTEN THEY WEAR THEIR ACTS AS A BADGE OF THEIR OWN HONOR

DISPLAYING IT PROUDLY IN PLAIN SIGHT

WEARING IT SO THAT ALL WITH EYES CAN SEE

THEIR KINDNESS GIVEN TO ALL BUT WITH CONDITIONS

THEY DEMAND FAVOR FOR THEIR FEIGNED CHARITY

BUT THEIR DEEDS ARE A STENCH IN YOUR NOSTRILS OH YAHWEH

THEIR ACTIONS AND THEIR WORDS A VEHICLE

A CONVEYANCE ON THEIR ROAD TO SHEOL

FOR THEY ARE NOT AT ALL LIKE YOU YAHWEH

IN FACT – OPPOSITE ARE THEIR ACTIONS AND CONTENT

THEIR DEEDS WILL BURN WITH FERVENT HEAT

FUEL FOR THE EVERLASTING FIRES OF TORMENT

WOOD, HAY AND STUBBLE THEY OFFER IN SACRIFICE TO YOU

YOU, WHOSE EYES ARE AS A FLAMING FIRE

YOU WHO JUDGES THE THOUGHTS AND DESIRES OF EVERY HEART

YOU WHOSE TONGUE IS A DOUBLE EDGED SWORD

YOU, WHO EVERYONE WILL STAND BEFORE ON THE LAST DAY

WAIT NO LONGER OUR KING OF MAJESTY

TARRY NOT ONE MINUTE MORE, OUR RIGHTEOUS KING AND REDEEMER

DELIVER YOUR PEOPLE AND JUDGE QUICKLY THE OPPRESSOR

CAUSE THOSE WITH STIFF KNEES TO BOW HUMBLY BEFORE YOU

HUMBLE THE PRIDEFUL AND FELL THE LOFTY TREES

BRING HAPPILY BEFORE YOU THOSE WHO YOU LOVE

ALL OF YOUR PEOPLE, WHOM YOU’VE ORDAINED TO BE YOURS

SEPARATE FOREVER THE SHEEP FROM THE GOATS

BRING TO PUBLIC SPECTACLE THOSE WHO PRACTICE UNRIGHTEOUSNESS

EXALT THOSE WHO LOVE YOUR KINGDOM AND YOUR NAME

BE GLORIFIED IN ALL THE EARTH

SHOW YOUR GLORY THROUGH THE ACTIONS OF YOUR PEOPLE

LET THE WICKED GO TO EVERLASTING SORROW

BUT LET YOUR SANCTIFIED REMAIN IN YOUR PRESENCE FOREVER

AMEN.

Copyright 2008 – Ruach Ha Kodesh via David Ben Yakov

INTERVENE OH HOLY ONE

 

Have vengeance for me oh Yahweh,

Have your way with those who torment me.

Shut the mouth of the wicked and prideful man.

Cause his tongue to shrivel on the inside of his mouth.

Make his folly known to all of those he has victimized.

Cause his superiors to perform righteous judgment.

Pay him back tenfold – recompense for recompense.

Let all of his generations know of his infamy,

And let them be ashamed of his misdeeds.

Let your righteous judgment fall upon him,

And cause all of his endeavors to fail him.

Let the things that he cherishes dry up,

And let them blow away like the dust during a gale.

Let there be no increase in his barns,

And let his herds not be found by him.

Make him a pauper – a man who is destitute.

Let him search for his prized possessions,

And let them not be found by him.

Let him no more make claim of Your Name,

And let him no longer be an affront to Your Holiness.

In your chastisement let him be corrected.

Let his eyes to be opened and his ears to be unstopped.

Cause his heart to feel unfettered sorrow,

And let his mourning be heard by many who are far off.

Shatter his haughtiness oh Yahweh,

And refine his heart in your fire.

Act in your might and cause him to hear your voice.

Receive glory by bringing him to the low places.

My delight is to see your glory shown,

And to see your justice performed in the affairs of men.

Yahweh Yeshua, you are King and Lord,

And your majesty shines many times brighter than the sun.

So, intervene oh Holy and Righteous One,

And change this man, or remove him forever!

Copyright 2008 – Ruach Ha Kodesh via David Ben Yakov

I STILL AWAIT YOUR ANSWER

 

If I might be so bold, might I ask, what do you want?

What requirements have I neglected, what price have I not paid,

That you see fit not to grant me the desire of my heart.

What I ask for is not hard for the maker of all that exists,

Nor should it seem to be an impossible task for an Almighty God.

My life has always been simple, I’ve never asked for much.

I’ve never asked for money or wealth like most men would ask,

For I know what such things lead to.

I’ve not asked for fame or recognition, which many certainly crave,

For I know that those things are really hollow facades.

I’ve not asked for might or power, for which men all covet,

For I know that you are the Kingdom, Power and Glory.

I’m content in the life that you’ve designed for me,

One where I can effect change and expect my reward when I reach Glory.

I’ve never really asked you for things that I wanted,

For wants are mostly requested out of selfish desires.

Instead, I’ve only asked you for needs, the basis necessities,

The simple staples of life; those things that are needed to survive.

But for years I’ve only had one request, only one desire for my flesh,

The love of a good woman who loves you and can love me.

Oh, I love the amusing antidote that my friends have said for years,

“God’s making that special one just for you.”

Does it take the same God who made all that exits, made it in six days;

Does it take you so many years to knit together one single woman?

Dear Yahweh, I know that they’re enigmatic, yes, maybe even for you,

But what do you answer, when will you hearken to the voice of my cry?

I only look for answers, for a sign or perhaps, maybe, some results.

Why the silence O Yahweh, where’s her presentation?

I’ve admitted my sin Yahweh, I’ve confessed my shortcomings.

In foolishness I did set out on my own to fulfill my need for a companion.

Like a blind man I did fall into many pits and stumbled over the goads.

I’ve allowed my heart to love those for what ever reason, couldn’t reciprocate.

I’ve allowed feigned lovers to lead my heart down a primrose path,

Only to have them push my heart off of the precipice at the end of the trail,

And to have it cut asunder on the sharp rocks below.

Yet each time you were faithful Yahweh, you picked up it’s pieces and made it new.

You healed this wounded man and rebuilt what was once destroyed.

Yes I’ve learned Yeshua, I’ve learned to obey and I’ve learned to listen.

And although I listen, I do not hear an answer; silence is my portion.

Be silent no longer Yahweh, speak to me in a clear and concise manner.

Whatever the answer, I’ll heed and obey, even if it is contrary to my desire.

I will continue to sit and wait for your answer Yahweh,

I pray that it comes quickly and that I hear it astutely.

And I promise to accept your decision with gladness and joy.

Copyright 2007 – Ruach Ha Kodesh via David Ben Yakov

 

Authors Note: The answer was received in August of the same year and she is a
wonderful woman who loves Yeshua. Her name is Lourdes…Hallelujah!!

FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY MADE

 

I exist and I am alive, but where did I come from,

I have no recollection of ever having been before.

I sit in this dark void, jostled from time to time,

The void casting itself in varied positions.

I am nervous and confused, what am I, who am I?

I should be frightened here in the dark but I’m not,

No, I’m peaceful, content and assured of my fate.

Something urges me to continue, to press forth,

But what or who is this presence, what is this drive?

Why do I feel special; what did you say, I’m called out?

You’re knitting me together in the secrecy of this place,

This blackness is but temporary, I will leave it someday soon?

Oh, whose voice do I hear, who talks to me so tender?

What purpose, what special thing, I just don’t understand,

I’m brand new; I continue to wonder what this is all about.

Please explain to me clearly, tell me plainly, what is life?

Why must I leave the security of this place?

I must be born? I must enter a hostile place of dread and fear?

I’ve done nothing wrong, why condemn me to such a fate.

Now I understand, I must live for you, for your purpose.

But still I need to know more, please read me the storyline.

Then like a wondrous picture you show me what is to come.

It is a life of laughter and sadness, one of loneliness and strife,

A life spent in solitude and in want of relational closeness,

One where love given out is never quite returned in kind.

Many things you reveal to me, countless sights I see,

I feel prepared, the map before me to guide me, a plan.

But why can’t you let me remember what you have shown me?

Why must I go through life like a blind man,

Like one in the dark who must feel his way with every step?

You are God, my Creator, tell me why this is so!

 

I showed you the scenes of your life to assure you of who I AM.

I want you to know that you have a purpose and are so very special.

Yes, you will enter a hostile and painful world shortly,

A world where some will seek to hurt you, some to destroy you.

It is appointed for you to walk in your own strength for a short while,

To rebel against me and yes, to even deny my; but you will return.

In your rebellion you will see sin for what it really is and will come to hate it.

Through your rebellion you will understand what rebellion is and will detest it.

During your time away from me you will turn to dark things, my enemy’s wiles,

But, when you gloriously come back to me we will use your knowledge against my foe.

I will test your faith in me by slowly answering your prayers but they will be answered.

Yet, to truly see how much you love me, some prayers will not be answered; you will understand.

You will long for companionship and for much of your life you will not find it.

But I will reward you for your faithfulness to me and for your steadfastness.

I will provide you with a wonderful crown, a beautiful jewel, a wife that all will envy.

You both will serve me until I come to receive you unto myself.

Your union will be a blessing to this world, a testimony to the saved and unsaved alike.

And when I take you both unto myself I will bless you with wondrous gifts,

Gifts so beautiful and unique that mere earthly words cannot describe.

You both will live with me forever, living, laughing, loving and worshipping me.

 

So go forth now, it is time for you to enter into the world.

It is time for you to begin your destiny in me.

I have chosen you from before the foundations of the world,

And because I have chosen you, nobody will pluck you from my hands.

Always remember and never forget that my promises are true and just.

And remember that I will be with you always and forever.

This is my promise, this is my purpose, and this is my bond.

Copyright 2008 – Ruach Ha Kodesh via David Ben Yakov

ON THE ROAD TO DAMASCUS

 

The road that I travel is rough, filled with the holes of time and war.

It is a road that has been traveled by countless armies over the millennia,

Infantries of antiquity marching in cadence with me this present day.

Comrades in arms walk with me today, trodding over unfamiliar ground,

The crisp morning air scented by the lovely cedars of Lebanon.

This land I could call my own, the milk and honey would I eat,

But the ravages of war prevent me from musing any farther.

Such a wondrous sunrise over the mountains that witnessed it so many times,

The life giving light that brings warmth and comfort; and another battle.

The same star rising in the east in quiet majesty,

Alighting over Mount Hermon, like it has, shining from the beginning of creation.

O how the armies of Assyria and Persia must have beheld the same sight,

How Alexander and Pharaoh’s have seen the sun come over the same crest.

The villages are quiet but for the stirrings of the few early risers,

Their work interrupted as they spy us and return indoors out of fear,

Or perhaps out of expectation of events that they know about all too well.

Perhaps their ancestors acted the same when Pharaoh’s army came over the rise,

Or Nebuchadnezzar’s or the legions of Rome, or the Crusaders.

They play out their parts in a production that is old as time itself,

Proving to me that there truly is nothing new under the sun.

 

We wait quietly, certain that those who have escaped, those who ran inside,

Might they will sound the alarm, to alert our ardent enemy, our sworn foe?

Surprise overcomes us as minutes tick by, the quiet continues.

Even the birds have ceased their music, their joyful chatter,

Waiting in expectation of what they somehow know is going to transpire.

Moving forward in silence, my heartbeat louder than any gun, any weapon of war,

Surely someone can hear it beating, someone will be alerted by its rapid thumping.

My mind checks itself constantly; safety off, three round burst, one round chambered;

And yes, the grenades are there, just like they were ten seconds ago; all is set.

What’s this I see, she’s so young so fragile, can’t be more than seven or eight.

If she was back home she’d be getting ready for school, picking out her clothes for this day.

But here she’s standing in harm’s way, about to witness death and destruction.

Sweet Yeshua, keep her safe, envelope her in your safe arms during the melee.

She motions to a house with shuttered windows, a tattered wooden door,

It appears to be dark, the peace of sleep seems to emanate from it; not for long.

Go inside I motion to the little angel who guides my way, shows me my path.

Thank you Yeshua, she went inside, she’s behind the stone walls of the house.

 

My foot crashes against the door, it breaks and falls to the floor with a thud.

A look of surprise from eight, no ten, no it’s twelve men lying on the floor.

Faces that seem to still in the fog of sleep, waking to a startling reality;

Today they’ll breath their last, their sleep will be perpetual in the twinkling of an eye.

With instinct some reach for their weapons, a mistake I wish they didn’t make.

My training takes control and I feel my finger squeeze back on the trigger.

My weapon rears up like a wild stallion as it gallops into the kill of the battle.

Flashes of light bounce off of the dark walls, ensigns of lightning my finger is producing.

One by one the men fall, reminding me of idols blowing down in the wind.

I grab an RPG that is standing like an guard against the wall,

It’s a sentinel asleep while on duty, standing there without orders, without a commander.

I’ll be your commander and I’ll give you specific orders, you will obey my commands.

We exit the hovel in full assurance we will not be accosted, no harm will befall us.

But what is this I hear, popping in quick succession, little flashes coming from another home.

The rock on the wall next to me chips away like someone invisible using a jack hammer,

This wall taking a terrible beating meant for me and my comrades.

The weapon in my hand levels, its aim being them trying to do us harm.

Then a noise like a Roman Candle, sparks and a trail of fire and smoke leave me behind.

A flash eliminates my assailer, he who sought my life is no more.

Running, but my attention is drawn back to that home, rapidly disintegrating into rubble.

Countless secondary explosions that increase exponentially each second,

Like some eternal conflagration, a glimpse at the lake of fire I surmise.

 

With haste we depart, choosing to hike rather than the highway in which we came,

Alexander’s highway, the Assyrian thoroughfare no longer safe, we’re the enemy.

Estimating the klicks as we walk, one, two, three – we’re probably safe.

But now the drone of a vehicle and what sounds like men screaming in Arabic.

Oh Yahweh, we’ve been made, discovered; enemies advance against us, frothing at the mouth.

In an instant one comrade falls, a bullet through the neck, he never had a chance.

We take cover, but in a ravine, our enemies on the hill; we’re ducks in a shooting gallery.

Another comrade shot in the leg, his blood spurting with every heartbeat; I can’t save him.

One by one, picked off like trout in a barrel, like a game animal during season.

I’m going to die anyway; must take some of the other guys with me I surmise.

I got two Yahweh, but there are so many, and they won’t stop till I’m dead; help me I pray.

 

My stomach hurts Yahweh, like someone just kicked me there, what does this mean?

I gaze down, there’s blood, lots of it…am I coming home to be with you now?

They’re coming down the hill now Yahweh, oh please deliver me from my enemies,

You did promise to do that, I remember all of the promises, all your precepts, you are my trust.

Gunfire, helicopters, voices coming from behind, not from the direction of danger?

Not the sound of Arabic, no, it’s the ancient voice of the Jew…you’ve kept your promise Yahweh!

 

The pain of hot lead, my gut hurts greatly, waves of unconsciousness crashed on my shore; I fight them.

Fight sleep until I know their fate, those who are as brothers to me, the Diaspora Brigade.

Medic shakes his head each time; their loss more painful than my bullet wound,

Each confirmation like another bullet entering the very center of my being, they’re all gone.

Too much pain to bear, I will succumb this time to the the waves of unconsciousness crashing upon me.

 

I awake, the ceiling moving, people walking beside where I lay, a sensation of motion; I feel safe.

Nurses gaze upon me, the object of their adoration, one whom they respect; I am content.

Thoughts of my parents, both busy about their lives and their families; not aware of my condition,

No knowledge of where I am or what I’m doing, thinking that I’m living the life of a loner, a recluse.

If I perish they will never know what I did, secrecy will keep them from being proud of me, silence is essential.

I want to hug my dad, kiss my mom and talk to my sister just once more time, please let me live Yahweh.

Drugs wearing off again, pain increasing, do the doctors hear me? Am I even alive?

Pain is leaving again…surgery??

 

Conscious again, stirred by a monotonous Hebrew man talking, oh, it’s the news on television.

Someone’s standing next to me; vision blurry; it’s a man with gray hair, his voice broken,

Broken by waves of emotion that toss him to and fro – please hand me my glasses I ask.

Aluf Sharon at my bedside; praying while holding back tears; Baruch Ha Shem, my son lives,

Looking up toward heaven he breaths a sigh of relief and thankfulness, hands lifted up in praise to Yahweh.

Reflections of how blessed I am – Aluf Sharon considers me as one of his own – I’m honored!

 

Bless Yahweh, now the voice that I’ve waited to hear,

An ever delicate voice that sets my heart to flight whenever I hear even her whisper.

My precious Leah, my love,  pushes past my commander.

Her very motion letting all in the room know that she is in command now,

All would gladly obey her, no matter what the order.

Tears fall from her face and light upon mine like a soft rain, a welcomed rain.

She holds me tight, like she’s never going to let me go.

My wound hurts, but don’t release me; the best pain I’ve ever felt

Her tears salty yet sweet refresh my very soul.

Utter contentment fills my entire being.

More my love, once I awake from my impending sleep.

 

Hallel Yahweh, you preserved me; my ever present help in time of trouble.

Yeshua, my light and my salvation, I shall not fear nor shall I dread.

The hosts of my enemy were camped against me, and by your grace I did not fear.

You are my shield and my buckler O’ strength of my soul.

On the road to Damascus, in the fertile fields of Eretz Yisrael, anywhere on earth,

Or somewhere in the vastness of endless space and time – You Are My G-d

Copyright 07/13/2007 David Ben Yakov

SAILING WITH CAPTAIN YESHUA

 

Sleep overcame my tired eyes and you lulled me to blissful slumber,

The stress and sorrow of a busy day dissolved away into sweet unconsciousness.

When before my eyes I beheld a land in decay and sorrow,

Streets filled with anger and distrust; a place of foreboding woe.

In the distance a ship, one of beauty and fine craftsmanship,

A sound looking vessel adorned with sails of a purest white material.

With destination unknown, I approach this fine ship, wondering, praying,

Should I trust my being to the operator, is He trustworthy, is he skilled at sailing?

A glance at where I have come from causes me to move forward,

I cannot go back to such a horrid place, returning to utter misery and fear.

Standing at the gangplank I question the crew, I have to know, what price?

The Captain, with hair of white and a beard to match answers my call,

In ever so soft but firm speech he speaks words that cause me to listen in awe;

I’ve paid your fare is the reply I hear from this wondrous looking seaman.

I knew you were coming, even before I built this incredible vessel.

Just one thing you need he says; believe that I have done this for you.

Feeling an irresistible urge to believe this man, and terms agreed, I board.

 

The ship sets sail with many others who are guests like myself,

Men, women, young and old, of all the families of earth and all tongues,

All united in our captain and trusting him on our journey to a better land.

We’re told of a land flowing with milk and honey, with streams of living water,

A place where where this is no sickness, sorrow or death, a place called heaven.

It seemed like the space of a lifetime passed in just a few seconds,

We were young, then old then infirm and then came the great barrier;

Something that loomed in front of the ship, a dark mist, foreboding,

A mystery we somehow all expected but somehow all hoped to avoid.

Fear not, the Captain cried out, as if anticipating what we all found apprehensive.

Trust in me and the mist will turn into a white cloud of joy, into a blue sky of bliss.

We could not resist His words, spoken with such authority; a voice of experience.

And when the ship passed through the mist we were immediately at our destination.

 

Before us was a city with walls made of jewels, its height reaching far into the sky.

The gates of the city were also jewels but were open for all who reached this expanse.

The flowers along the path sang the name of the Captain and they bowed as He passed.

Palm trees clapped their fronds as we passed by, applause for all who overcame.

The sky was blue and smelled like a sweet summer rain, clean and fresh.

I smelled the colors that were around me and could hear them also.

As I breathed in I could taste honey mixed with the sweetest of new wine.

What sounded like the voices of innumerable singers filled the air.

I could see the music as well as hear it and it smelled like frankincense.

All who stood there had a radiance and they shone like the sun,

All having the same brilliance that the captain possessed, but yet not as bright.

In one accord we followed the Captain, like a fold of sheep follows a shepherd.

 

Having led us to a great table, the Captain then sat each person individually,

Welcoming each attendee as though they were the guest of honor at this feast.

The accommodations were for a countless number of people, the table infinitely long,

Yet, I could see the whole table and all who sat there,

My spirit comprehending the once incomprehensible.

As I beheld all who sat there I then grasped the significance of this dinner setting.

For I looked at all who attended, and we were all dressed in fine white clothing.

Every soul there appeared perfect, no spot, no defect, no wrinkle – like a beautiful young bride.

And the bride cried because we realized that we were now betrothed to the Captain, the King.

The long days and years of waiting, of suffering and yes, sometimes doubt, just melted away.

All of the old cares and anxieties just dissolved and could be remembered no more.

We awoke like one does from a dream, into the reality that was true all along.

And the words spoken from heaven in the past finally became so real;

And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death,

neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain:

for the former things are passed away. Revelation 21:4

Copyright 5/5/07 – Ruach Ha Kodesh via David Ben Yakov

ADD TO THE CUP OF MY LOVE

 

Set before me is a cup, a cup that is my very own.

Some people fill their cup with coffee and some with tea,

Others with worldly things of their varied choice.

My cup is a cup filled with love, hopes and dreams,

With the very aspirations of your hearts and souls.

My cup is a very old cup, an antique to the utmost degree,

Formed before the very foundations of the world came into being.

It has been poured out many times for many people,

From the days of the Garden and up to this very minute.

A very special ingredient in my cup is that of love.

I’ve poured it out so many times that my wrists sometimes hurt,

But I endure because I know that compassion is so very needed.

T’was  once a day many years ago when my cup poured completely out,

When I hung on that cross and showed my love to its highest degree.

But many are the times when I wished that people would add to the cup,

To sort of fill it up; adding instead of constantly taking from my reserves.

For although I have adequate supply to sustain all for eternity,

It does hurt that my love is taken advantage of.

Will you ever realize how it feels to have your cup emptied daily,

To be refreshed every night, only to be emptied the very next day?

O’ how I wish that our relationship was more than a one way street,

That we’d walk with each other on the journey of life and have true communion.

O’ how I wish that the feelings of love that I have for you, so very strong,

Would be returned in even the smallest fraction back in my direction.

It hurts me so very much when I constantly proclaim my love for you,

Yet you find it so hard to voice back to me some of the same sentiment.

I am your protector, your shield and your buckler, the one who loves you so.

I died for you once and would again if it were possible, but it is not.

Oh yes, if you could just say that you love me, those three simple words,

My heart would leap for joy and I’d bless you with your every possible need.

It would cause me to make forests in the desert places of your lonely hearts,

It would cause me to create flowing rivers in your dry and barren places of your souls.

It would cause me to make the sun sing during the day,

And I would have the moon lull you to sleep with precious melodies.

I would make the trees clap their hands whenever you passed by them,

And the waves of even the smallest pond would resound in a beautiful chorus.

Your bodies; my temples; would shine forth like the noonday sun,

And the lost would come in an endless throng hear you tell them about me.

It’s such a simple thing that is required of you, not a harsh burden, not impossible.

A simple task it is to love me, to return to me what I’ve given to you.

And I don’t require a full measure, just a few drops at will do at first.

Those few drops will produce incredible amounts of flowing waters,

Streams at first, then rivers, bays and oceans to a wonderful extent,

So much so that the whole world could not contain the love that we share with each other.

The iniquity of this world is but a fleeting moment,

Just one grain of sand in the hourglass of eternity.

Please do not allow it to harden your heart, or grow your love cold.

Yet again I entreat you, love me; I’ve done all that I can do,

And I will sit here patiently, waiting for the love that I desire and so deserve.

I’m coming soon, and I bring my reward with me,

And I pray to my Father that my reward for you will be plenty,

So much so, that my angels will strain to carry it.

Be blessed my child, for you are loved greatly.

 

Copyright 5/30/06 Ruach Ha Kodesh via David Ben Yakov